Dating is a lot of fun, but it can also be overwhelming and scary. Even more so, if you have anxiety disorders or other mental health conditions.
Luckily, overcoming your nerves of dating can be as easy as practicing self-care and making simple changes. Relationship expert and psychotherapist Neil Wilkie shares his best tips to help you curb your anxiety – for good!
1. Take a break.
Whether you’re nervous about your next date or you’re just feeling like dating is taking over your life, it’s important to remember that it’s OK to take a break. You can always go back to it when you feel ready, but having a little bit of space and time to focus on yourself will help you get a fresh perspective again.
Getting out and having social interactions with friends, family and people you enjoy will make you feel less anxious about dating, and it will also give you the opportunity to reconnect with yourself. This will allow you to see how much you love and appreciate yourself, which is something that can be difficult when you’re busy with so many other things.
Once you feel confident about yourself again, you can start to focus on the right person for you and that will be the most exciting part of it all. You will also find that you’re able to attract more positive and fulfilling relationships into your life, which is an added bonus!
Another reason to consider taking a break is if you’re feeling scared about the future of your relationship. This could be fear of the unknown, or it could be fear that you aren’t good enough for your partner.
If you are in a relationship that you haven’t been able to work through problems, then it may be time to consider a break, says Kongit Farrell, LMFT and founder of Inspired Journey Counseling Center. “It’s important to take time to reflect, but you need to know what you and your partner want to do during this time,” she says.
Taking a break from dating is a great way to figure out what you really want in a partner and it can help you avoid repeating past mistakes. It can also teach you what qualities you are looking for in a relationship and what you don’t want.
2. Get some fresh air.
It’s common for people to feel nervous when they are meeting someone new, especially if this is their first date. This is natural and you should not let it stop you from meeting someone you want to spend time with!
But there are some things you can do to help get over the nerves and have a great date.
One way to calm down your jitters is by taking deep breaths. Breathing in fresh air helps your body feel energized and clearer. It also helps to promote the production of serotonin, which is a mood-boosting hormone that makes you feel happier and more relaxed.
Another thing that can help you to relax is to practice self-compassion. Studies have shown that people who practice self-compassion are less likely to experience anxiety and depression, which is good for your mental health.
Finally, you should try to be open and honest with your feelings about your dating anxiety. Nerves Of Dating This will help to put your mind at ease and make it easier for you to enjoy the date, says McDowell.
If you find it hard to express your feelings, speak with a professional therapist. They will be able to advise you on the best ways to deal with your anxiety.
Getting some fresh air is also a great way to relieve your nerves and reduce your stress levels, according to Richardson. In fact, if you can get enough fresh air every day, it will help to lower your blood pressure and heart rate.
Getting some fresh air is also a good idea when studying for finals, as it will help you to focus on your work and ignore distractions. Plus, it will give you a break from the hustle and bustle of your busy schedule!
3. Do something you enjoy.
One of the best ways to get over the nerves of dating is to do something you enjoy. Whether it’s a walk, a meal or just talking with a friend, finding time to do things you enjoy can help make dating much more enjoyable.
It also improves your mood and reduces stress. And it can be an important part of building positive relationships, which are linked to happier and healthier lives.
For starters, try to spend some time doing things you love and that make you feel good every day. This can be a little harder than it sounds because you may have to work around family and other responsibilities, but making this a regular habit will help boost your confidence and keep you happy.
Another great way to do this is by putting aside some time each week to do something you enjoy. That might be something simple, like talking a 20-minute walk or going for a jog, but it will give you a break from your usual routine and improve your outlook on life in general.
To start with, write a list of the things you enjoy doing or have enjoyed doing in the past. Nerves Of Dating This will give you a sense of where you can start to rekindle those old passions, or find new ones that you never had the chance to pursue in the past.
You can then choose one or two activities to focus on, and set up an appointment to start exploring them again. You might want to consider taking a class or two to learn more about them before committing yourself to a weekly schedule, as this will make it easier to see if they’re really for you.
4. Do not get ready 10 minutes before you need to get out of the door.
One of my favorite rules of thumb is to never get ready 10 minutes before you need to get out the door. Not only is it a smart move for your mental health, it also helps avoid the dreaded last minute dash to the bathroom. The last thing you need is a nervous wreck before a night out on the town.
Now, there is no such thing as a definitive rule of thumb for dating, but there are several things to look out for and a few signs to take note of that may help you on your way to happy ever after. The best way to go about it is by taking one step at a time. First, make sure you are getting ready for the right date. Next, don’t be afraid to be a little bit flirtatious. Finally, don’t be afraid to ask your date what they are most looking forward to doing on the night. This will make them feel special, and you’ll be more likely to come out on top as a winner.
5. Be yourself.
If you are feeling nervous on a date, there are a few things that you can do to ease your nerves. One of them is to be yourself. This sounds obvious, but if you are trying to be someone else on a date, it will only end up making things worse for you.
This is because people want to know that you are a real person and not someone who is just trying to impress them. If you try to be someone that you are not, you will not only be miserable, but you will also have wasted your time and energy.
Another thing that you can do to be yourself is to be honest about your anxiety with your date. Nerves Of Dating This can be a difficult thing to do, but it is important to disclose your feelings because it will help you feel more comfortable in the situation.
Your date may also be able to provide you with some support. They might also have experienced similar anxieties, so they can understand your experience.
The key is to find a way to talk about it with your date, and this can be a very powerful experience.
Once you have been able to speak about your anxiety, you can start to break the pattern and slowly reveal parts of yourself that you are currently hiding from your date. This can be a little scary, but it is important to break the cycle.
The more you are yourself, the more confident and likable you will become. This will make your dates more likely to like you, and the better chance you have of finding a partner who is compatible with you.
